Gaming squad role call

This table squads up for a game — assign: tank, DPS, healer, shot-caller, and the AFK one who says 'gimme a sec' and vanishes for thirty minutes. Then vote: who carries every match, and who screams 'that one didn't count, run it back'?

• Throwback round: who has actually ditched plans with friends to keep gaming? Victims may cross-examine.